A DEFINITION OF A CHRISTIAN MARRIAGE
A Christian marriage is one in which at least
one partner is a believer in Christ, who embraces the attitudes and actions
prescribed by the Scriptures in their relationship with their mate.
A good Christian marriage is one in which Christ
is manifested through the marriage relationship by at least one of the
partners.
THE COVENANT OF A CHRISTIAN MARRIAGE
Christians approach marriage as a covenant, a
relationship based on promises and commitment, not just feelings—though love is
most certainly involved.
The concept of marriage as a covenant is rooted
in the Hebrew faith, and early Christians preserved the belief as well .To
speak of marriage as a covenant is to say that the partners make mutual
promises about the way they will choose to live in the future, not just
declarations of how they feel in the present the endeavor to live into those
promises.
THE CHRISTIAN MARRIAGE PROGRAM
Processionals and seating of guest
Greening to assembled guest
Arrival bridal and the groom
Opening prayer and meditations of marriage
Bible reading
Exchange of vows
Exchange of rings
Pronouncement of marriage
Signing of the register
WEDDINGS RECEPTION
Entrance of the guest
Cocktail hour/ photo with and bride and groom
Dinner reception
Speeches
Cake cutting
Couple first dance
Bride and father / groom and mother dance
Dancing
Bouquet toss
Garter toss
Dancing
END
THE DAY WITH A CLEAN SLATE
The Bible says in Ephesians 4:26 to not let the
sun go down while you are stillangry.Make it a goal to clear the air with your
spouse on a daily basis. Fortunately, most days there will not be a need to
clean the slate. For those days where tensions are high make an agreement with
one another that you will work out your differences before going to bed.
NOT
50-50
The Bible says that it is a man’s responsibility to love
(Ephesians 5:25) and it is a woman’s responsibility to submit (Ephesians 5:22).
If the husband will commit to love then it makes it much easier for the wife to
submit. If the wife will submit, the husband will have less trouble loving her.
The beautiful thing about this is that God does not say, “A man should love his
wife if she will submit.” Or, “a woman should submit to her husband if he loves
her.” Each spouse’s responsibility is independent of what the other one does.
When a couple looks at marriage as a 50-50
agreement then they will always play off of how the other treats them. However,
when they see themarriage as their sole responsibility, then they will have a much
stronger and happier marriage.
KEEP
PERSONAL PROBLEMS PERSONAL
Don’t share your marriage problems with your
co-workers. If you are seeing a marriage counselor then it is important to be
open and honest. But when chatting with your friends at the water cooler or the
hair salon, you need to guard your negative words about your spouse. Long after
the problem is resolved your friends will remember. They weren’t part of the healing
process and therefore they won’t know how to forget.
LIVE
WITHIN YOUR MEANS
One of the major causes of divorce is money problems. Live with
the money you have. Even though you think that expensive
gift (that you can’t afford) will help endear your spouse to you, it more often
than not will drive a wedge of insecurity in your relationship.
DIVORCE
IS NOT AN OPTION
Never
enter a marriage with the thought that you can get divorced if things don’t
work out. Regardless of your interpretation of the biblical passages dealing
with divorce, you should make it a personal commitment to your spouse and to
God that you will not consider divorce as an option. Enter the marriage with
the understanding that you are making a solemn vow before God to your
spouse that you will stay together until death separates you.
GUARD
YOUR HEART
Protect your eyes, ears and
mind. Men, you need to learn to look away when your eyes are drawn to other
women in an inappropriate way. Ladies, you may hear sweeter words from your
co-worker than you do from your own husband. Remember to whom you made a
promise to love—even when times are difficult.
FORGET
THE PAST
Isn’t it amazing how, all of a sudden, you can remember things
from the past that you thought were forgotten when an argument arises between
you and your spouse? Forget the wrong that he or she has done to you in the
past and focus on the present and future.
COMPLIMENT
IN WORD AND ACTION
The word “compliment” can
mean a couple of different things. First it can mean to say nice things to one
another. It can also mean to do something that helps the other to be stronger
or look better in the eyes of others. Both senses of the word compliment are
important in a marriage.
LOVE
ONE ANOTHER
Make a decision to love one another even if
your spouse does not deserve your love.
PUT
GOD FIRST
Most people who want to
protect their marriage will say that their spouse is more important than their
job. Unfortunately, it seems that people who are in ministry (pastors,
missionaries, etc.) will say that in a list of priorities their wife is
sometimes at the top of the list and sometimes their ministry is. If you put
God at the top of your priority list, He will show you where your emphasis
should be at any given time. If God is truly first, then the other priorities
will fall into place.